(Versión en español)
It was the first Christmas without my father, who died last February. He used to tell me to make a stop during the last days of the year and think how it was.
Well, it was not a common one, and neither prolific. But I started important changes within and outside.
One different thing is that, contrary from what I usually do, is that I decided to take some actions: getting back to exercising on a bicycle, writing a diary, posting once a week in this blog and also in a Spanish version, and spending more hours at the painting studio.
Let the year roll!
In my morning rides something has been going round and round in my head: as I explained in my last post, I’ve considered to teach less hours per week.
Well, biking surely clears my mind. Although it will mean less payment, I’m going to have more time to be an artist.
I am cleaning all the mess in my studio, from the end of the school semester. It makes me happy and ready for more drawing/painting time. I think studying the new degree has helped, but I thank my beloved old blue bicycle for all the kilometers of clear mind.
I have been a teacher for a long long time. The first day I was in front of a group was back in September of 1978, after the invitation of a friend to teach math and social sciences in middle school.
So I’m thinking to slow down. It could be nice to teach less hours. As I’m getting into my 60’s, I would like to spend more time painting and drawing. I don’t regret being a teacher, but I really prefer being in my studio.
I haven’t mentioned, but I’m studying a master degree in human development. In class we have talked about simplicity and simplifying life. What I’m trying to do, anyway.
The other day I tried to choose only five pipes from my collection, but couldn’t. I’m not ready jet. I may keep half of them, and I think it’s a good beginning.
What I did is to let go some clothes. It’s nice to clean, and feel more space in the closet and drawers.
I’m happy. I’ve started to declutter and it feels good.
I love this time of the year. I’m not good with hot summer days, I prefer autumn.
7 in the morning, ready to start a ride. It’s a little cold, around 10° C. I can feel the fresh air in my face while moving. I feel peace.
Maybe is true what I read recently, biking is like meditation (Mindful thoughts for cyclists). It’s a great way to start the day.
Night ride to go with my friends to meditation. One of them would share with us her notes on death. And here, again, detachment shows up.
Why is do difficult to get rid of possessions? Do I really need them? I don’t want to answer, because I know I’m not going to like it.
So, action instead. I’ll start with my pipes. Let say that I give away half of them. Or, maybe, I only keep 5. Could I manage this?
I got on my bike again, pedaling back home. Thinking on detachment, and what pipes I could keep.
I’m tired, I didn’t have enough sleep, I have to leave now. I may not meditate this morning.
Some days, I skip my morning meditation. Somehow it’s very easy to find a reason. I mean, it’s not that often, but it happens. And it may happen with other things, like exercising, or end some chores.
I’ve decided to use a japa mala around my wrist. It reminds me of my purpose to change my habits, to meditate daily.
Some may say that it shouldn’t be necessary, if I was sure of my intention, or the way I have chosen. But it’s a process, and it requires an effort. So this little sign, the mala, keeps me on the path.